Parents spend years secretly yearning for the day their kid’s are off the dole. No more college to pay for. No more hairstyles, allowance, cell phone bills, speeding tickets. The end of paying for spring and fall clothes, car expenses, and animals they wanted, but then dumped on you.
Monday my daughter Landon left to volunteer in a hospital in Thailand that cares for orphans with AIDS. She will be gone at least a year.
I am so proud of her, giving a year of her life to this project. She has worked hard all year to cover her expenses, and will live with her aunt and uncle Tripp and Allison Johnston who are missionaries there. Landon is not a missionary, just an unpaid worker.
She spent the last week saying good-bye to her college friends, her mom, and then Sunday night went out to dinner with me.
We talked about the money I will still send her to help out, and when and where we might meet during the next year. That may not happen, with airline prices and schedules so wacky.
We also talked about what we ment to each other, but kept it light for obvious reasons. Then I walked her to the car she borrowed to see me. We looked at each other, and just broke down. I couldn’t believe this tiny girl was heading to the other side of the planet. There was a part of me that was angry.
I watched her drive off.
The next day I called her at 5 Am on my way to work. She was on her way to the airport. During the 7 AM news I knew she was taking off for a trip that would take most of two days.
I couldn’t complain. Since she was a little girl I had always encouraged her to experience the world and it’s exotic wonders, both big and small, and to love people who are in pain. Writing this, I am looking at a picture of us hugging in front of Big Ben in London, the day before Diana died. I think she was 12. I took her on the trip with our listeners.
Today was a little better. I knew she was in great hands with her aunt and uncle. They are solid, loving people, who adore her.
Then I made two calls. The first was to my insurance guy whom I told to remove her from my insurance because she wouldn’t be driving here for a year. That saves me $60.00 month. The second call was to the cell phone company. I told them to take her off my bill, because her phone won’t work from Thailand. That saves me about $80.00 a month. The idea that she is off my contact list was numbing.
It is the hardest $140.00 I ever made. And I am so proud of her.
After reading this, I shed a tear. Hits too close to home as any parent who lets a child go knows. Wonderful story, Bob. Thanks for sharing a very personal part of your life.
Posted by: Sandy | August 09, 2008 at 07:58 AM
Bob,
The relationship you have with Landon will sustain both of you over the next year. You've built it over her lifetime. My husband and I were never blessed with children, but I have a niece and nephew (twins)who I love as if they were my own. They are entering their senior year at the University of Michigan in the fall and it amazes me how quickly they've grown up. Recently my husband and I took Daniel (my nephew) to dinner and he shared his decision to spend 2 years with Teach for America after he graduates in June. He'd like to work with children in New Orleans or another area of our country in need of his services. "Lump in the throat" time for me. I was so proud looking at this beautiful young man whose heart is in the right place. So is Landon's. The world is a better place with them in it.
Hang in there Dad and thanks for sharing.
Barb
Posted by: Barb Michelutti | August 11, 2008 at 08:10 AM
Bob, you have earned the right to be proud. Congrats! I am so happy for you!
Posted by: Andrea | August 12, 2008 at 08:51 PM
Bob, this was such a great blog post. I hope Landon is doing well in Thailand.
Posted by: Amanda of Shamelessly Sassy | September 04, 2008 at 03:15 PM
Mr. Lacey,
That was one of the sweetest and most loving tributes from a parent to a child I have ever read. You have every reason to be proud of Landon as she ventures forth into adulthood. If she is anything like her father, she is going to be an amazing person in her own right and I look forward to reading about and hearing more about her adventures within the next year.
Posted by: Lynne Stevenson | September 07, 2008 at 12:30 PM
Bob:
I just read your story about your daughter leaving the country. Very touching and what a great Dad you are. Thanks for sharing your story. I am sure she feels the same about you.
Kate
Posted by: Kate Todd | September 16, 2008 at 07:45 PM
Sigh. Tears were brought to my eyes and my 3 daughters are only 7,5 and 1.
Posted by: Lisa | October 01, 2008 at 10:52 AM
All I can say is a bitter sweet "awe" when I read you saved $140. I'm lucky to have parents that encourged me to travel/ follow my dreams, hence taking a year off to backpack around the US and a month in Indonesia after high school. Now 14 years later my husband and have fond memories of travels in the UK, Ireland, Canada and Italy. May both father and daughter adventures continue to unfold as lovely as they have up to this point.
Posted by: Ruth Anne Wood, You Can't Get It 'Cause You've Already Got It! | November 14, 2008 at 07:56 PM
Hi Bob: I read this blog when you first posted it. It was wonderfully written and I could relate to your pain of letting go...My children are both full grown, married with children of their own. My nest has been empty for about 10 years...I must admit that I feel the empty nest syndrom quite a bit throughout the year but mostly during the holidays. I share this with you as my oldest daughter, Crystal just went to Galveston, TX for emergency disaster services with the Salvation Army. Her tour was two weeks and she called me 3 times during those two weeks. She was in awe of the devastation Ike left behind. (I secretly prayed that she would not find a dead body) I worried each and every day for her safety but lo and behold, she came back safely! My husband and I spent Thanksgiving with her and her family and I looked at her with such pride. I could see the spiritual lift this tour gave to her and I thank God for her having the opportunity to grow within herself. She may be an adult but she is still Mommy's little girl! N.C. Smith
Posted by: Nina C. Smith | December 10, 2008 at 07:28 PM
Nice Bob,
Wow, thanks for bringing me to tears! (light sarcasm) I am a realitively new listener and am sooo hooked on your morning show. I live in Petaluma, Ca. (50 mins north of SF) wanted to check out your website and it brought me to this post of yours. It is of no surprise why you and Sheri are so popular. It brought my visit to see my son in college right to the surface. The summer that he would be leaving to attend was harder than the divorce I went through. I thought I was over it, but no, it brings to mind just how much I love all 5 of my children and what they mean to me. It has been 4 years now since he graduated and now lives in New York. Doing well, but I miss him so much.
Michelle, my youngest teen daughter and I still poke fun at you wacking on the wrong smoke alarm. I work for an electrician running his office and that wasnt the first time I had heard that story!
You guys rock!
-Kim Williams
Posted by: Kim Williams | April 23, 2009 at 05:23 PM